The human body truly is a magnificent machine. Lately I've been trying to take better care of myself, and it's been a learning experience. I moved to a brand new place and there have been a lot of changes in my life, so improving my health and well-being seemed to be a natural extension of that. It's interesting how people (including myself) use busyness as an excuse to abuse their bodies. We're too busy to choose and prepare healthy foods, too busy to exercise our bodies and provide them with the rest they need to recharge. But at what price does this "scraping by" come? I recently decided that the things I've been too busy doing to take the best possible care of my body are going to have to go on the back burner for a change. And here's what I've learned in the process:

1. Reprioritizing really does make you realize how important a lot of your old activities... aren't. The hour I've been exercising each day hasn't really reduced the quality of my work or my friendships. This is because I was spending at least that amount of time every day doing nothing, reading celebrity gossip, and watching TV on the Internet, mostly. My life has only improved by giving up these things.
2. Pain can be satisfying. Waking up in the morning sore from working out the night before reminds me that my body's not in shape but is getting closer!
3. My body tells me what it needs. Last night I went to bed at 7:30! I was exhausted, I slept, and this morning I woke up refreshed and rejuvenated. I didn't fight the sleep my body was asking for, and as a result I practically sprang from bed this morning and have enjoyed the extra hours of morning productivity. I have a friend that went out West over the summer. He lived out of his car while he traveled and followed what he believes to be the natural rhythms of his body... to wake when the sun comes up and to go to bed when the sun goes down. He's since returned back to school to teach fall semester, but he said it's never been more satisfying to live the way his body dictates instead of the way society does.
4. Every little bit helps. I used to have a mentality that if I didn't have time to go to the gym for an hour, I wouldn't go at all! I'm going to a friend's house for dinner tonight, so instead of skipping the gym altogether, I'm going for 30 minutes. I still get to enjoy time with my friends without feeling I've compromised my new priorities... it's a win-win.
5. I still have time for the things and the people that really matter. And feeling more energized, more fit, and healthier only improves the quality of these activities and relationships as I have more to offer.

Restoring your body to health and vitality certainly isn't an overnight process, it's been challenging and rewarding. It's quite a joy to embark each morning feeling healthier and stronger. I definitely recommend it.

While it may seem a crude sentiment, a health instructor once told me that “an open mouth is an open pussy.” She's right, in a lot of ways. Both are mucous membrane areas that are susceptible to infection from disease, and both can be the receptive end of sexual activity. So, when it comes to your safe sex talk, it is important to get that done early on in a dating relationship, before you find out something you really wish you had known before you locked lips. (Example reason you might feel that way: herpes simplex A and B are interchangeable. Genital herpes can become oral herpes and vice versa.)

Still, if you haven't yet kissed a person, it might feel a little bit presumptuous to ask them about their sexual health, but that really is exactly what you want to be able to do. Most recently, your intrepid naked explorer monkey had a situation where she needed to do just that. It was her third date with the potential kissee and she was ready for a little bit of lip locking action, but first, she needed to know that it was a safe activity. After all, nobody wants to go home or share something unwanted, and certainly something that would follow them around for the rest of their lives. In this case, it was quite simple. The conversation led to that most awkward of places, the “so, how do you feel about this...about...me” where both parties stumble over the words to tell the other that they like the other person a lot. And so, yours truly just piped up with “so, here's the requisite conversation that I have with everyone I want to kiss. I am very protective of my health, especially my sexual health, and I want to remain that way. I don't have any sexual health issues, is there anything I should know about you?”

As awkward as that conversation can feel at times, when both parties know not only that they have a green light to go, and that both parties are disease free, it really does free things up. In this particular case, it paved the way for a few kisses, which was certainly a desirable outcome. So, just remember dear monkeys, that you should take safe sex before your mucous membranes get all intimate, not after!

My children were never picky eaters, but my son's little boy, my first grandchild, sure is! As his Nanny and his nanny, I have the joy of spending my days spending time with him, allowing my son and daughter-in-law to go back to work and gifting me with the ability to spend so many sweet moments with my grandson. Through online research and a few recipe books, I've been learning how to sneak healthy foods into my grandson's diet. It's taken lots of patience and creativity, but it was definitely worth the work. It was really starting to bug me that Ethan's diet consisted of chicken nuggets, macaroni and cheese, pizza and grilled cheese. I'm happy to share my healthier eating tips with you that are kid tested and Nanny approved:

Treat eating like the adventure that it is. Don't necessarily rule out foods like sushi and fruit and vegetable dishes because they're "adult food" as this will just put a veil of mystery and a suggestion in their little minds that they shouldn't like something before they even try them. My rule of thumb is that I don't offer Ethan anything I wouldn't be willing to eat myself. Take chicken nuggets, for example. I wouldn't touch those those processed, chemical laden things if you paid me, so when he's at my house I offer him free range boneless, skinless chicken breasts I've rolled in breadcrumbs and baked. He doesn't seem to mind, and I love them, too.

Involve your kids in meal planning and preparation. Having kept him for four years, I know the foods Ethan likes. With that in mind, I feed him the foods he likes but with the a healthier twist. I starting macaroni and cheese with whole wheat pasta and he's never noticed a difference! and I slowly started mixing bite-sized pieces of steamed broccoli in with it, and he ate it. I kept adding more and more and now there is almost as much broccoli as there is macaroni!

Make it fun: I cut up fruit and put them on kebab skewers and serve them with organic blueberry yogurt. He dips the fruit in the yogurt and can't get enough of it at breakfast time! I'd be cutting the fruit anyway, so it only takes a minute to pop them on the skewers.

When it comes to mammals, most of them are walking around with a full-body coat of hair.  Note that I said walking; sea creature don't apply to this argument, although some do have fur.  So, what's up with the spotty patches of hair on humans?  Where is our coat?  Our skin, naked even with it's many hair follicles has only the downiest of hair to protect in some places, and a full pelt in others.  Some lineages are discernibly hairier than others, and men tend to wear their fur much thicker and more broadly distributed than women, so what gives?

There is certainly more than one school of thought out there as to why we kept the hair we have.  By "kept" we're talking evolution here.  Monkeys have been getting less hairy for quite some time; old world monkeys have 170 hair follicles per square centimeter, apes have 90, and humans only one.  One theory is that when humans became upright creatures (thanks glut muscles!) we reduced the surface area of our bodies that were exposed to the sun.  The SA/BM (surface area/body mass) ratio is what helps animals regulated their body temperature and maintain homeostasis, and since humans are particularly bad at panting-- we tend to hyperventilate-- we rely on our skin to do that work for us.  Our shape also helps- the longer, thinner limbs and bodies of humans are more effective at dispersing heat.

Heavy fur can protect skin from the sun, but it also traps heat close to the body.  Without our fur, our skin does not have protection from the sun's rays, but it can sweat and release heat more efficiently.  The brain, that most important of body parts,  is also the most sensitive to temperature changes, and just happens to have its home in the most fully furred section on our body.  That makes sense, after all, don't want the brain getting too cold!  If you doubt how important a role your hair plays in keeping your head warm, try shaving your head in the middle of winter!

So, the fur we do have- what's it for?  Well, let's see.  If we start at the top- hair on the head keeps our brains nice and warm.  The hair above our eyes protects our eyes from sweat running down into them, which stings quite miserably, if you haven't experienced that before.  The hair under our arms and at our groins serve to protect the area due to the friction of moving arms and legs as well as capture our scent, which provides information to others in our vicinity.  Of course, they also trap some rather nasty odors, so showering is always a good thing.

The real question here is this:  is it weird that we like to wear the fur of other animals, even though it is no longer necessary, when theoretically, being fur-free is a evolutionary step upwards?

It is one thing to be an animal, living outdoors and doing what comes naturally.  However, when you put on clothing, and enter into society as a walking, talking, two-legged human, the rules change.  It is today that I express my displeasure at the lacking nature of this change.  It is a recent complaint, and an isolated one.

Recently, we got some new boy animals at the office.  Now, this office of which I speak is more like a house.  No cubicals, no sex-specific bathrooms, no corner offices, etc.  Unfortunately, it seems that some of these boy animals are not quite acquainted with potty etiquette.   And so,I have some thoughts.  You see, I live with a boy animal, so I know full well the full capabilities of such a creature.  I do not blame the new boy animals alone- I think they have sparked misbehavior amongst the other boy animals as well by relaxing the standards.

You see, I know for a fact that putting down the toilet seat is not difficult.  I know that aiming, while not an exact science, can usually be executed with a fair amount of precision. I also know that there is an actual understanding of why you should not pee on things and then not clean it up.  I even hear that sitting down is something they know about.  So, my question is this:  if you pee on the floor, and then leave the seat up, why should I trust that you didn't pee on that too?   I'm not touching anything after you pee everywhere!

Here is my suggestion, to the new boy creatures at the house:  sit down.  That's right, sit down to pee.  It's good for your prostate and will save you from peeing on the floor.  If you do accidentally pee ANYWHERE other than inside the toilet bowl, clean it the f#$* up.  Leave the toilet seat down (all the way down is best, lid and all) and wash your hands.  This is a work environment, after all.  We'll cover how to groom and dress oneself later.  Such monkeys!

If you've been noticing  lines on your lips that stick out from your lips when you're applying lipstick or lip gloss, it's probably a sign it's time to exfoliate your lips. Most people periodically exfoliate their skin and their face, so it only makes sense that you'd need to exfoliate your lips, too. But sadly, the lips are an often overlooked part of the body until they're found to be lacking in texture or appearance, even though taking good care of them will help keep them looking and feeling great all the time.

There are countless products on the market claiming the ability to magically exfoliate and transform your lips, but you can accomplish the same goal by using inexpensive household items most everyone already has at home. All you need is sugar, water, and oil (sweet almond is great) to start on your way to smooth lips.

Start off by adding a drop of water to a  teaspoon of sugar. Next, using your finger, gently massage the sugar/water solution into your lips in a circular motion for about two minutes. Then you'll be ready to rinse the sugar off your lips, drying them afterward with a warm towel. After your lips are free of sugar residue and dry, generously apply a layer of oil on the entire surface of your lips. After you've let the oil to sit on your lips for 10 minutes, you're free to wipe it off. Your lips should look and feel visibly smoother.

Your lips are sensitive skin and subject to the harsh elements of sun and wind, so try and keep them moisturized and protected by using a lip balm with sunscreen, vitamins, and other nourishing moisturizers. Keeping them moisturized exfoliating them regularly will keep them looking and feeling their best... because you never know when you may want to them to be kissably soft!

Tattooing has a long record in a great many cultures.  Throughout history, various groups all over the world engaged in tattooing practices.  For some it served as rites of passage or signs of social rank, while for others tattoos were used to mark criminals and slaves.  In some cultures, the tattoos you receive are meant to bring you great strength, while in others it is means of permanently marking the body for identification purposes (such as for sailors and men in the armed forces).

Whether you're getting a tribal tattoo in the old method (hand-tapping the ink into the skin via a sharp instrument like a bone, knife or needle) or having it done with a modern tattoo gun, the chances are you'll be coming out with a pretty specific image.  Unfortunately, there are also plenty of "accidental" tattooing methods that leave the skin permanently marked:

• Powder in a wound:  with substances like gunpowder or coal dust, an open wound is like a tattoo waiting to happen.  Ever wanted a permanent record of the injuries you're received?  Now you know how!  (You could also just add gentian violet, but that being antiseptic, it isn't nearly as hardcore)
  

• If you have ever stabbed yourself with a pen and pencil, you may have a spot where ink or graphite (thank goodness we don't use lead anymore) has remained beneath the skin.
  
• Road rash:  When asphalt is rubbed into a wound- usually a wound it created- it can leave permanent discoloration of the skin.  Bikers aren't just wearing leather for the fashion statement it makes.  It is powerful protection against having their flesh turned into ground meat that will heal into a scarred, discolored remembrance of their accident.
  

It's not something that most of us mind suffering from, really.  Having had too much sex is in fact something that most of us celebrate.  Unless of course, you're bruised, sore, chafed, in pain, tired, or even a little cranky afterwards.  Here's how to ensure that even too much sex is a good amount! 

1.  Once your enthusiastic activities have reached their end and you've collapsed in a sweaty mess on the bed, reach for the water bottle you so conveniently placed on your bedside table.  Drink slowly and don't gulp to avoid a sloshy-feeling stomach.

2.  Stretch.  Roll your wrists and ankles, do cat-cow yoga poses (stretching your back) and giving a great big cat-stretch on the bed before you get up.

3. Walk directly to the bathroom and pee- both of you.  This will help prevent urinary tract infections.  If either of you experiences any discomfort peeing, head to the kitchen, eat a handful of cranberries and ladies, if things are feeling especially tender, go ahead and take a probiotic (or eat some yogurt with live active cultures) to make sure everything is still balanced.

4.  Next, have a small snack with some essential fatty acids and preferably some protein.  Grab some nuts and dried fruits for an extra-healthy after-sex snack.  Fix yourself something along the lines of an Emergen-C to replenish vitamins and electrolytes.  Smart Water is another electrolyte replacer that you might consider.

5.  If anything is sore, swollen or bruised, grab an ice pack, wrap it in a towel and apply to sore area with a big smile on your face.

When you hear "lung cancer patient," do you think of a person who chain smoked for decades? So did I, but that isn't always the case with lung cancer. Ninety percent of women and 87 percent of men who die of lung cancer were smokers, but what about the others? Exposure to radon gas and other air pollutants like secondhand smoke are sometimes to blame, along with other factors. Being mindful of the quality of the air you breathe and not smoking are two of the biggest ways you can prevent lung cancer.

If you smoke, quit. Studies show that after smoking cessation, former smokers' lungs are able to regenerate lung tissue and repair the damage that even years of chain smoking has done. It may be difficult or even take a few tries to break the addiction, but remember that smoking is shortening your life, costing a lot of money, and damaging your lungs and the lungs of those inhaling your secondhand smoke. Every week, take the amount of money you would have spent on cigarettes and put it in a jar. After you've finally kicked the habit, treat yourself to something that will remind you of your promise to stop smoking for good.

Whether you're a former smoker or not, add a variety of fruits and vegetables to your diet. These nutrient rich foods abound with antioxidants and flavonoids that repair cells and protect DNA.

Be mindful of the quality of air you are inhaling into your lungs to help prevent lung cancer. Avoid secondhand smoke, as even the smoke from cigarettes contains carcinogens. Many cities are now invoking citywide no smoking ordinances, making avoiding secondhand smoke easier than ever. Frequent bars and restaurants that prohibit smoking or have adequate division between smoking and nonsmoking areas. Be aware of other air pollutants that could be damaging your lungs, particularly in the workplace, where air pollutants tend to be quite common. Asbestos, diesel exhaust, gasoline, and coal products are common carcinogens found in the workplace. It's your right and your employer's legal responsibility to keep their employees safe while they work.

A visit to your doctor can help you to determine your risk level of developing lung cancer, including determining factors like family history, living habits, and carcinogen exposure. They can then help you develop an action plan about how to minimize your level of risk.

Folks, if you aren't up for being waxed and don't really care for the idea of keeping a jungle betwixt your thighs, then might I mention the joy of shaving?  Heck, you don't have to shave it all- many prefer to keep some nice fur up top but shave all the good bits.  Why go hair free?  The aesthetic is part of it for many, but it is also about the sensation.  The sensitivity of the skin is greatly heightened when its naked, as it were.

So, here are a few tips to keep things happy when you're tiptoeing through the tulips with a razor:

As awesome as your body looked as you flipped in midair doing that brand new bike stunt, the broken leg you acquired when you hit the ground at seemingly 50 MPH? Not so awesome. Depending on your lifestyle (average level of activity, job, family, living situation), breaking your leg may be a little simpler to live with. But for others, breaking a leg can be catastrophic, leaving one to wonder how they'll survive and perform everyday tasks until the cast comes off. First, put your injury in perspective by reminding yourself that the discomfort and limited mobility is temporary, and be grateful for that. Also, be humble about receiving help from others. Many have been in the same situation, or will be, so they'll be happy to help you with simple tasks like carrying groceries or books.

Many who break their leg experience irritation from the cast in the form of itching or the difficulty in showering. To remedy itching, pour a small amount of baby powder into the cast. Then, using a hair dryer on a low setting, blow the powder from one end of the cast and out the other. This will cut down on the itching. When it's time to shower,  wrap your cast in a plastic bag pr plastic wrap and secure it with duct tape. This will protect your cast from getting wet. While you're in the shower, be careful not to slip. If your shower has a bench, use it, or place a waterproof chair into the shower to use. Taking a bath while your leg's in a cast is a better idea; you won't have to worry about slipping and it's a great opportunity to relax.

Driving while your leg's in a cast can be tricky. If it's possible, recruit a friend or family member to give you rides where you need to go, or take public transportation. Even if your driving leg isn't the one in the cast, driving with a cast is awkward due to the extra weight and the space it requires, so be careful.

Shin splints occur as the result of an imbalance between the muscles that alternately lift up and pull down the foot. Shin splints are very common with new walkers and joggers that embarked on too strenuous of a program too soon, or those that have recently changed their shoe style or stride. Shin splints can be a painful nuisance and a stumbling block (no pun intended) to your new fitness program, but if you build up your shin muscles your shin splint pain will eventually go away and prevent you from getting them again.

If you have shin splints, go easy on your body until you've recovered, walking or running only every other day until the pain disappears. Before and after you exercise, ice your shins for 20 minutes. Stretch and begin with a slower warm-up pace before speeding up. Listen to what your body tells you. If you're in pain, slow down and see if the pain subsides. If it never does, end your walk or jog. Remember that the better you care for your body while you recover, the sooner your recovery will be complete and you'll be back on the jogging trail.

To prevent yourself from getting shin splints again, replace your running or walking shoes at least every 500 miles. Even if the upper part of your shoes or the soles aren't showing wear, the exhausted shoe cushioning will contribute to your chance of developing shin splints and foot and leg fatigue. When selecting a good running or walking shoe, the shoe should bend easily. If you're not able to twist and bend your athletic shoes, chances are your feet and shins are fighting them with every step, too,  so choose a shoe that's relatively pliable. In the same way, try and find a non-concrete surface to run or walk on; softer surfaces are more gentle on the muscles and joints. Shin stretches and toe raises can make your shin muscles stronger and more flexible, so research stretches you can do before and after your exercise.

I've recently been attending some really great parties.  You know how it goes, as summer begins to draw to a close, it very quickly becomes obvious that the time left to spend outdoors is limited, and so people begin making plans to do so as often as possible in the coming weeks.  One thing that many of these parties have had in common are hot tubs, of various sizes.  There have been regular swimming pools that have been converted into hot tubs, as well as the usual "seats 8" tubs.

What has been so nice about these hot tub experiences, other than the blissful experience of leaning back in hot water to enjoy the night sky and some friendly conversation, is how comfortable people are in their skin.  I've yet to see a single person in a bathing suit.  Clothing optional isn't even a word on the horizon, because really, who wants to be wearing clothes in a hot tub? 

Even better is how easy and comfortable it is to be naked around other people in that context.  Nobody is touching anybody else, nobody is staring untowardly at anyone else, nobody is worried about what their body looks like, or who is looking at it.  Sure, you tend to notice people's bodies, but it is less of a sexualized thought process and far more a simple appreciation for the human form.  I have friends, one or two who I can think of off the top of my head, who would not be comfortable in this situation.  I certainly respect their desire to keep their clothes on, but I also hope that they find their way to that level of comfort, at least among friends.

In pondering whether there is such a thing as too much naked, one has to first define the point, goal, or desired experience of being naked.  After all, for one person, too much naked is probably what others would set as not enough naked.  So, let's look at kinds of naked, goals of naked, and the experience of being naked.

Naked for enjoyment: Naked for enjoyment is probably the easiest one to rate.  If you are enjoying yourself, you're at the right level of naked.  If you find yourself resenting other activities because you can't be naked, well, you might need to move down to the next category.  If you need to be naked to enjoy yourself, it might be time to invest in new clothes that come in natural, breathable fibers.

Naked as naturalist: There are those who believe that naked is our natural and rightful state.  Personally, I believe this to be true only when the weather is nice.  However, if you feel like this is the case, you will likely need to strike a balance between home life and clothed life.  You might choose to investigate activities that allow you to be in your natural state.  Start with a weekend visit before you move to a nudist colony, though.

Naked for attention: If you find yourself continually getting naked to get attention, be careful that naked doesn't become too normal.  This happened to me once.  There was just so much naked that it stopped being anything attention-grabbing.  The cure was to bring back clothing that shows *just* enough to make one wish for nakedness. 

Of course, there are so many more reasons and results of being naked, so feel free to consider and make your own list of when, where, how, why and the guidelines inherent to each situation.

Editor's Note:  the following article does not contain the opinion of all of those here at Naked Monkey.  Some of our tongues have been bitten, to prevent snarky comments from escaping.  Carry on...

I was recently reading a celebrity gossip article about the diminutive Olsen twins and how they're fighting about whether or not to get breast implants. Apparently one of the twins wants them, while the other does not. Their particular, ummmm- twinness is such a brand that if the unwilling twin refuses, all bets are off. Very interesting. But this prompted my thinking about breast implants and how they work. If you've been sitting around wondering, too, help is here!

The first thing to know about breast implants is, if you're considering them, it is a big step. Breast implants can alter your appearance greatly, so be prepared for that. You'll also probably have to buy new clothes. And it's invasive surgery, so be prepared for a painful recovery and being absent a week or two from work. Be aware, too, that future surgeries will likely be necessary to replace the implants to maintain that first post-surgery appearance.

When you've decided to seriously consider breast implants, you'll need to decide between saline or silicone implants. Here are the facts:

Saline breast implants are placed inside of a bag that's made of silicone elastomer. This is to protect you in the event that one of the saline implants bursts. Saline implants require a smaller incision because they are not inflated by the doctor until they're already inserted into your body. The doctor will then pump the flat implants with saline to achieve the size you've chosen pre-surgery. Discuss the brand and type of saline implant with your doctor before the surgery, because certain saline implants will create an unsightly rippled effect if too much saline is added.

Silicone implants are the most popular choice as they have a more natural look and feel. This is because the silicone gel in the implants actually conforms to the natural shape of your breast. And in the event of a leak, silicone implants will hold their shape longer than saline implants, so you don't have to worry about having a completely deflated chest before you go get surgery to correct the leak. The price of silicone implants does tend to be more than saline implants, though, and silicone implant ruptures can be very dangerous.

Before your surgery, there are steps you can take to aid your post-operative recovery. Researching the size and shape of the implants you want as well as your preferred method of surgery are great ways to be adequately informed and prepared for this big decision. Reading a comprehensive book on breast augmentation surgery such as Cosmetic Breast Surgery: A Complete Guide to Making the Right Decision--from A to Double D by Robert M. Freund is a great place to get started. It's also helpful to ask your doctor for a preoperative checklist so you can know what to expect after your surgery. Having a supportive friend or family member to come stay with you for a few friends after your surgery to assist you in your recovery is invaluable.

A transformative surgery like breast augmentation can be very exciting, but a little scary, too. Go into this process well-informed and prepared, and the rewards you reap after your surgery will be that much more enjoyable.

Today I was talking to a friend who was telling me about how they were going to start taking a pilates class or start dancing again; seems he has an extra 30 pounds on him he would like to get rid of and so far he has had no takers on his attempted offers to give it away free.  As we talked further it became clear that there are extenuating circumstances...apparently this friend of mine , who happens to be a musician (aren't musicians supposed to be starving and thus skinny?) was also complaining about how 3 or 4 beers just wasn't doing it for him anymore.  The picture was getting more clear than triple distilled vodka.

"Beer," I said, "is pretty much just liquid bread, you would not eat a couple loaves of bread a day would you?"  Do not get me wrong here, I think it would be great for this guy to get exercising, it would do him a world of good, but the reality is that drinking three to four beers several (or more) nights a week does not count as weight lifting, but it goes a long ways towards weight gaining.  I suggested to my friend that beer hadn't done it for me in a long time, so I had switched having a vodka early in the evening followed by soda water or plain water the rest of the night.  "Why waste the money and add the extra weight if the beer is not doing it for you anyway?"  Have the hard drink early on for the social loosening or light buzz and then drink water to re-hydrate and help cleanse your system whilst still appearing social by having a drink in your hand.  It's great, it keeps you in the scene without comments about why you are not having a drink, the soda water is particularly good at giving the illusion you are 'drinking'; while looking out for your health and weight.

Seems he had not ever realized the beer=belly bulge equation!  So now my friend has a new diet program: less beer, more buzz, and hopefully a pilates class or two to help burn off the beer he has already built onto his body.  A bit of dancing will do him good as well, and keep him too busy to drink, all of which helps him lose the unwanted weight.  I feel certain he can do it successfully, my work here is accomplished.... now for that glass of post-article porter...

Think your water is safe?  Think again.  Even if you are filtering your water or drinking it from a bottle, it may contain something that surprises you: drugs.  Yes, that's right, there are drugs in the water system, although maybe not the kind you think:  pharmaceuticals.   Researchers in multiple countries have found that the water supply has a discernible amount of pain killers, anti-depressants, cancer treatments, antibiotics, birth control pills, and seizure medication among many others.

Studies in Germany, Canada and America have all revealed similar results: the water leaving treatment plants contains not just medication, but also ingredients from cosmetic products.  Wanna know something weird- they've found fish in lakes that contain sunscreen.  Of course, animals play a role in this as well- hormones that are fed to animals often end up both in our food and in our water supply.  Actually, that's still the fault of humans, I guess.

How does it get there?  Obviously flushing pills down the toilet or throwing them away gets them into the environment pretty quickly, but actually, simply taking these medications into your body is all that is necessary.  What goes in must come out, so all these chemicals find their way down your toilet and into the water system each time you go to the bathroom.  It cycles right back into your body in the form of the water you drink in that these chemicals can be found in most all water sources (think about what you learned about how connected water is...it all cycles through).  Water bottling companies, many of whom actually just repackage tap water, do not usually test for, much less treat the water for drugs.

It's not just humans who are affected- aquatic life is actually the most at risk.  It would seem that anti-depressants and the female hormone estrogen are wreaking the most havoc on fish, especially in a reproductive sense.  Another concern is that all these drugs floating around are just going to give bacteria and viruses the tools they need to get stronger, and the last thing we need are more antibiotic-resistant diseases out there.  Of course, that's exactly what's going to happen if we don't clean up our acts.  And it will be a lesson we need to learn. I, meanwhile, will be attempting to find a water source upstream of the majority of the aging or medication-happy population.

(Other than having energy for sex later)

           

Napping. Everybody wants to do it every now and then. You're watching the clock tick away, it’s nearly three in the afternoon, and you’re thinking “Wow, this would be a great time for a nap.” Actually, you’re right. Even though American culture is not a fan of mid-day sleeping, it turns out that a short power-nap in the afternoon may improve productivity and reduce stress.

           

Most of us don’t get the full amount of sleep that we require each night. Between the hectic, long hours at work, keeping up with family life, and trying to balance all the fun that a night on the town can offer, eight hours of sleep is almost an unreachable goal for some. If you’re anything like me, you might average six hours of sleep per night. Sleeping patterns such as this can have negative effects on your body; these include slowed reaction times, dulled short term memory, and a loss of patience.

           

So what’s the best way to catch that cup before it falls off of your desk, remember that the pen you’re looking for is really behind your ear, or even not snap at that overly-chipper co-worker? Power nap! It takes about 20 minutes out of your day, once you’re already starting to feel a little tired.

          

The best power naps can happen over your 30 minute lunch break. Simply cut down on the caffeine while you’re at work; yes, it will keep you up, but that means it will be harder to nap! Set an alarm so you don’t over-sleep: you don’t need your boss to find you snoring in your cubicle after your break has come and gone. Definitely don’t try to nap for more than 45 minutes; shorter naps will keep you from going into deep sleeps that require hours for a rejuvenated feeling. Now, you can go back to work ready to accomplish all of those tasks that are still weighing you down!             

 

Sleeping, in my opinion, is nature's cure-all for a wide variety of ailments. Afternoon naps helped me get through college, giving me a jumpstart late afternoon to stay up late studying and writing papers. And when I get sick I secretly rejoice about all the opportunities for napping. I heard someone say once that an hour spent napping is equal to 2 hours of night sleep. I don't know the validity of this as I'm not sure how your body could really tell the difference, but I do know that sleep is a huge part of how I keep myself feeling healthy, happy, and strong. When my sleep schedule starts to get neglected, I find myself getting more emotional, having less focus, and just feeling dull. Here are some tips to getting more sleep and getting on a more regular schedule:

1. Try to set a regular bedtime, and stick to it. A good rule of thumb is to set your bedtime for 8.5 hours before you actually need to wake up. This way, even if it takes you a little while to fall asleep, you'll still get seven or eight hours. Eventually your body will become accustomed to going to bed at the same time each night and will reset your internal clock.
2. Exercise regularly. Exercise is great for your heart, fighting cancer, weight maintenance, and sleeping. Exercising tires you out and fights stress, both factors that will help you fall asleep more easily.
3. Try to cease stimulating activities such as watching TV and surfing the Internet before bed. They'll make it more difficult for you to relax and may tempt you to stay up later. Reading is an excellent alternative.
4. Avoid drinking caffeine or alcohol a few hours before bed, and be careful about the things you eat. Avoid sugary foods or foods that may upset your stomach by not allowing them to properly digest before you go to bed. Even if you're able to fall asleep with stimulating food and beverages in your stomach, you may not sleep as well as you would otherwise.
5. Some say that napping is not a good idea because it's disruptive of your night's sleep. In my experience, though, your body tells you what it needs. If you're exhausted mid-afternoon and you're able to take a nap, I recommend doing so. It may involve staying up a little later to feel tired, but that makes sense because you snuck in some extra sleep. But wake up at the same time in the morning, though, and resume your normal sleep schedule.

There's nothing like waking up refreshed from a good night's sleep. The benefits are definitely not to be underestimated. Take steps to get consistent sleep and you'll reap the rewards of more energy, more focused concentration, and a greater feeling of overall wellness.

Beautiful, glowing skin is great, especially if you're not a fan of wearing makeup. Beautiful skin starts from the inside-- drinking lots of water and eating a wide variety of fruits and vegetables is not only good for your body... the nutrients are great for your skin, too. Avoid drinking excessive amounts of alcohol and soft drinks, and avoid greasy, fried, or fatty foods.
In the same way that a healthy diet helps maintain a healthy weight and healthy skin, regular exercise does the same. Exercise detoxifies your body, eliminating toxins and oxygenating your blood, only improving your overall health picture.

Glowing, beautiful skin is healthy skin, so find a skincare regiment that is suitable for your skin type. Make sure your skin care regimen includes an at least once weekly exfoliation treatment. Exfoliating kills dead skin cells, letting the fresh skin beneath come through. If you're acne prone, you should visit a dermatologist to find a regime that's right for you. Two little known ways your skin is exposed to blemish-causing dirt? Your cell phone and your hands. With the amount of time most Americans spend with their cell phone planted against their face, it needs to be clean. Use an antibacterial gel once daily to clean your phone, cleaning any acne-causing bacteria.

Many people enjoy the glow that lying in the sun and getting a tan provides, but the sun is highly damaging over time ,leading to premature wrinkling and sun spots, so make sure each time you're out in the sun you've applied sunscreen-- even when it's not summer. Consider using a bronzer to add an additonal healthy glow to your face or all over. Make sure you use an all-natural formula, though... your skin is highly absorbent and the largest organ in your body, so you want to make sure you take the best care of it as possible.

Today, more than 20 million Americans are living with diabetes, an all time high. Many are genetically predisposed to developing diabetes. If someone in your immediate family has diabetes, for example, you’re automatically more likely to develop diabetes. 57 million Americans are pre-diabetic, but a diagnosis of pre-diabetes doesn’t necessarily mean you’ll one day develop the disease. A doctor can perform blood tests that will screen your body for predisposition to diabetes. If your doctor determines that you’re pre-diabetic, you can avoid getting the disease by making healthy adjustments to your lifestyle.

If you’re overweight and prediabetic, lose weight. Studies show that people who are overweight are more prone to developing diabetes, so improve your diet and commence an exercise program to lose the extra pounds. Avoid foods high in fats, oils, and sugars in favor of fruits, vegetables, whole grains, lean meats, and low fat dairy products. The Centers for Disease Control reports that pre-diabetics who adhered to the Mediterranean diet were 87% less likely to develop the disease. The diet both reduces inflammation (a major cause of diabetes) and insulin resistance. Even making simple changes to your diet can make a difference. Substitute water for soda, use brown rice in place of white, and substitute olive oil in place of butter or margarine. Treat meat as a condiment, only eating small portions of lean meats like chicken, fish, and pork tenderloin. When eating chicken and turkey, always remove the skin.

Studies conducted by the National Diabetes Education Program showed that just 30 minutes of exercise 5 times a week in conjunction with moderate weight loss is enough to reduce diabetes in pre-diabetics by 58%. Schedule regular exercise sessions into your day, and try and fit in extra exercise when you can. Park your car farther away when you go to the grocery store, the bank, the mall, etc. Take the stairs instead of the elevator, walk places instead of driving, and try and take your dog for a walk everyday to fit  small bits of exercise into your lifestyle. Little changes can really add up.

Changing your lifestyle will make you feel better and reduce your risk of developing diabetes. Losing weight, exercising regularly, and eating a healthier diet are lifestyle modifications that will prevent a variety of diseases and health problems, including diabetes, so every step you take to improve your health and fitness will really pay off.

I remain unfulfilled in my search to find an adult female with hands smaller than mine. Comparing my hands to those of others has become a bit of a party trick of mine. By all accounts I'm a adult-sized person, but at some point my hands seemed to have had their growth stunted. They're functional, though. I knit. I type. I cook. My hands do all the things yours do. Well, kind of. Here are some things my hands cannot do:
1. My hands cannot wear adult gloves. I've long given up on my search for posh gloves. I can only wear children's gloves, the knit kind that come in every color of the rainbow. Isotoners don't seem to come in miniature. A few Christmases ago I saw some brown polka dot gloves with faux fur trim. I liked them so much I cut them out of the magazine, found the website where they could be purchased, and added them to the Christmas list I always give my parents. I unwrapped a box on Christmas morning and found the gloves, which my mother had managed to find in size "small." They should have been called "not small enough," as about 1/3 of the finger portion of the gloves remained vacant once my fingers were inside. Not very functional, they've remained in my glove compartment (Yes, I'm one of the few people who actually keeps gloves in her glove compartment).
2. My hands cannot use salad tongs. I was at a restaurant with my friends in college when a large bowl of pre-dinner salad came to the table. I grabbed the salad tongs to serve my friends when we realized my hands weren't wide enough to spread the expanse of the scissorlike tongs. I actually can use salad tongs... but it takes two hands.
3. My hands cannot cease to amuse my father. Growing up I remember bringing friends home for sleepovers, or for dinners. Without fail, over dinner Dad always asked two questions. First, he would ask what the friend's father does for a living. The specificity and quality of the answer was, to Dad, representative of the girl's relationship with her father, a factor he considered important. The second question always went something like this: "I see you and Sarah have struck up quite a friendship... but there was one thing I've been wondering-- have you seen her hands?" The friend would look at him questioningly, which only goaded him further: "I mean look at them... she should take those hands straight to the nearest carnival!"

If my pink cowboy boots were made for walkin', then I think my hands were made for talkin'... or something. We can talk all you want about why I always wear brightly colored gloves that look like they came from the kids accessories section of WalMart... just please don't ask me to toss the salad.

Many people find their energy bill doubles or even triples during the holidays. This is due to keeping more lights on while entertaining guests and holiday lighting, especially if the Christmas tree stays lit most of the time and exterior Christmas lighting is used. But how do you cut back on your energy bill without seeming like a modern day Ebenezer Scrooge? There are various ways to save energy during the holidays without giving up your festive decorating style.

The first step in saving on your energy bill during the holidays is modifying the type of lighting you use. Consider a switch to LED Christmas lights, which are a little more expensive but use 90% less energy than standard Christmas lights. Fiber optic decorations are also extremely energy efficient. Most fiber optics use only one lightbulb to light the entire decoration! Regardless of the type of lighting you use, be smart about when you turn the lights on. Wait until dark and turn them off before you go to bed. Six hours of use or less is a good goal to set. If you have trouble remembering to turn the lights off, set the lights up on a timer and you won't have to worry about it.

Aside from lighting, there are many other opportunities during the holidays to save energy (and money). If there are a number of guests at your home for a party or even an extended visit, turn your thermostat down a few degrees. No one will notice the difference because the warmth of everyone's bodies will keep the space warm, but you'll notice the savings on your power bill. Especially with holiday parties and holiday cooking and baking, a good deal of energy is used in the kitchen during the holidays. Be smart about when you use your oven; try to bake as many things as possible in one use of the oven, and use a microwave or a toaster oven for smaller tasks. When cooking on the stove, leave lids on as much as possible. This keeps the energy in and the food cooks faster.

Finally, avoid using "phantom energy." Phantom energy is the energy used by appliances that are plugged into the wall and aren't in use. Unplug as many appliances as possible before you leave town for the holidays. Phantom energy is money wasted. The more energy you save during the holidays, the more you can spend on other things as the new year approaches. Many people enter the new year overwhelmed by the amount of money they've spent on gifts, trips, etc. during the holidays. Take steps to reduce the amount of energy you use during the holidays and all year, and you'll save energy and money.

If your doctor has recently informed you that your cholesterol is high, you may have been left scratching your head, not knowing what this means for your body and your future. The first thing to know is that there are 2 different types of cholesterol. LDL is known as the "bad" cholesterol because it can clog your arteries and increase the risk of heart attack. The optimal level of LDL cholesterol is less than 100. HDL is known as the "good" cholesterol because it attaches to the LDL cholesterol and helps transport it to the liver, which then cleanses it from your body. The ideal number for HDL is 60 or higher. With HDL and LDL combined, the ideal number is less than 200.

The human body naturally makes some cholesterol, but the rest of it comes from the foods we eat. For this reason, eating right can improve your cholesterol levels. Foods that are high in saturated fat like fatty meats, egg yolks, and full fat dairy products should be avoided in favor of leaner meats, egg whites, and low fat or fat free dairy products. Processed and fried foods contain trans fats, which should also be avoided when seeking to improve your cholesterol. Heart healthy eating doesn't have to mean deprivation, though. Many heart healthy foods taste great while actually improving your cholesterol levels. These foods include oatmeal and bran, nuts (especially almonds and walnuts), and fatty fish such as tuna and salmon.

Aerobic activity is proven to boost good HDL cholesterol levels while lowering bad LDL cholesterol, as well losing weight. The combination of improved diet, increased exercise, and weight loss is usually enough to sufficiently lower cholesterol, but some people's bodies don't respond as favorably as others to these changes-- they make all the changes but their cholesterol levels don't improve enough. But for these people, the doctor will make other suggestions or prescribe medication to lower cholesterol. Many of these medications significantly reduce bad cholesterol and actually boost good cholesterol, too. But as with any medications, there are side effects.

 

When you've been diagnosed with high cholesterol, do your research and, as an informed patient, consult with your doctor about the best treatment for you.

Since the cold is an airborne virus, catching it can be easy if your immune system is vulnerable. In bad cases, the virus can mutate inside your body, leaving you sick for weeks with your symptoms constantly changing. Fortunately, preventative measures like eating healthfully, exercising and sleeping adequately, and taking supplements will help you fight the common cold before you catch it.

Try and eat healthfully all year long, but especially six weeks before the cold season. Fruits and vegetables contain vitamins, minerals, and antioxidants that will help you keep sickness at bay. Make sure you drink lots of water and you may even want to start drinking orange juice for some additional vitamin C. If you like drinking tea, drink green tea brewed with pomegranate for a delicious antioxidant booster. Take a multivitamin that includes a B Complex and plenty of Vitamin C. You may also consider taking a garlic supplement. Garlic is a natural antibiotic and will help boost your immune system. And, don't worry, if you get an odorless supplement your breath won't offend people.

Exercising regularly and getting adequate sleep will help keep your stress levels in check. Too much stress can compromise your immune system, so keeping your body well-rested and energized will keep your body relaxed and strong, capable of fending off colds. Exercising will also help you sleep better at night.  Finally, wash your hands. It can be disturbing when you become aware of how many things your- and everyone else's- germ-infested hands regularly touch, so wash your hands thoroughly and often, especially before you eat or put your hands around your nose, mouth, or eyes.

Whether you're naked or clothed, you are always in your body.  In fact, that very same body (although the cells will turn over many, many times) is meant to last you from birth until death.  Taking care of it so you can have as much monkey fun as possible is definitely the name of the game.  Eating right, exercising, de-stressing and experiencing lots of fun and pleasure is an important path to keeping your body in great shape.  Another important thing to do each and ever day, or close to it, is stretching.

You only need to stretch gently to see benefits.  Mobilizing joints and moving your muscles through their full range of motion will help keep your body loose.  Muscles won't cramp up as often and joints won't get stiff.  Each morning, when you wake up, stretch long like a cat.  Then, roll over into child's pose.  After a few moments, press up to arch and curve your back.  In yoga, these are cat-cow poses.  Sitting on the edge of your bed, roll your head, ankles, and wrists around a few times.  When you stand, your body will naturally adjust it's posture.  Give yourself a few moments to make little adjustments before heading off to start your day.

I have news for you.  News that you might not like.  Using condoms is not enough to call sex "safe."  No matter how many nifty commercials you've seen in which rubbers are praised as the end-all be-all of safety, you are not done there.  Oh no.  In order for sex to actually be safe, by which I mean the fullest elimination of cross-contaminating bodily fluids possible, you need to be breaking out the latex, or the latex-free for the allergic, much sooner than actual intercourse.  Unless of course, you meet a person and immediately commence with PIV sex (no kissing, no foreplay, etc).

What does that mean?  Well, as a very wise woman once told me "an open mouth is an open pussy."  She was right of course- mucous membranes being what they are, it's one of the easiest ways to transmit diseases.  It is for this reason that the person on the receiving end of penetrative sex is more vulnerable to infection- be it a woman or a man.  Does this mean you shouldn't kiss? Well, that's a tough one.  For true safety, no.  But, in most cases, as long as the person you're smooching doesn't have open sores or a herpes outbreak on their mouth, you're unlikely to catch anything other than a cold.  So, kissing, we'll leave alone.

Kissing down there, however, is a completely different story.  Here's the deal:  if you're not using a dental dam for cunnilingus and a condom for fellatio, you are not having safe sex.  Your options for intercourse involve both a male and a female condom.  Hand to genital contact involves wearing gloves or finger cots so that there is no chance of blood infection through scratched skin. That's it, end of story.  There are no ifs, ands or buts about it.  People pass on disease when they do not show any signs of an outbreak and some studies indicate that it's possible for one person to contract a sexually transmitted disease, incubate it in their body, and pass it on to another person without ever knowing that they themselves were infected.

Sex does not have to be scary all the time, however- there are wonderful programs that, in many places, allow one to receive free STD and HIV testing.  Check with your local department of health to find free testing near you.  When you're ready to have unprotected sex (birth control is a completely different issue, and one with many options), then you want to be fluid-bonded with your partner(s).  Fluid bonding means that there is an exchange of bodily fluids within a closed relationship or set of relationships.  Most people take fluid bonding quite seriously- and it should be, not only for its intimate implications, but also for safety reasons.  Sex outside a fluid-bonded relationship would then need to follow the safe sex guidelines listed above in order to not jeopardize the other partner.

If you're feeling like your parade has been rained on a bit, that's fair.  Most people take a bit of warming up to the realization that sex has not been "safe" for many decades outside the confines of monogamous relationships in which both parties have been tested and are faithful.  It's too bad, but that's the state of the world.  Wearing a little extra rubber or latex shouldn't put a complete damper on your fun, and if anything, it gives you a really wonderful goal to work toward in a relationship:  that special day when you both have negative test results in your hands and birth control taken care of and you can let your juices flow, fly, drip, or whatever else yours might do.  Have fun!

Perhaps you might want to consider developing a latex or a rubber fetish.  Just imagine, a nice slick anatomically correct latex bodysuit....it would be the safest sex you'd ever had!

There has recently been a lot of talk about Lindsay Lohan posing in imitation of Marilyn Monroe.  She looks fine, as far as I'm concerned.  A perfect example of the big-breasted narrow hipped body type posing in imitation of yet another lovely woman that the industry chewed up and spit out.  The sad thing is that Lohan is barely 21 while Monroe was 36 and both appear about as used by the big bad world of showbiz.  Now, before you shake your head and wonder away, that's not what this article is about.  Instead, I'd like to focus on naked people (guys and gals) all over the world.

Gleeful nudity is a wonderful thing- it creates magic in front of the camera (look at pictures of Betty Page- it's her energy and enthusiasm that really make her pictures so amazing) and stems from many different impulses.  Whether it's dancing in your living room wearing just your socks or running a naked race on the beach in full view of the whole world, embrace your nekkid bod for the work of art that it is.

Here a few examples of naked people all over the world doing some pretty unconventional nakey-time activities:

• Marathon runner and all-around adventurer Don Kern has stood naked at both the North and South poles.
• Lakpa Tharke, a Nepalese climbing guide, stood naked at the top of Mount Everest for three minutes.
• Richard Foley crossed the European Alps naked, and was the first person to do so.
• The first naked flight (passengers and all) took place on a Boeing 737 from Miami to Cancun in 2003.
• The world's largest naked protest is the annual "World Naked Bike Ride," which is focused on green issues.
• The world's largest strip rock-paper-scissors contest takes place in Japan. 
  

There are of course, many naturist organizations and resorts for those who prefer to do slightly more mundane activities while nude, or who prefer longer-term nudity.  Remember: naked doesn't mean sexual, and well, if you think about it, that's true if the conditions are reversed as well.  So, get naked.  Have fun!

Greetings pervs, sex dorks, and fabulous people,

This week we've gotten downright earthy and we hope you'll enjoy learning all about how to get friendly with your cervix.  This is, um, mostly for the ladies.  Disclaimer.

Cheers,

Eva